


You Never Asked

by eli-wray (blessedharlot)



Category: The Great Library Series - Rachel Caine
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Gender, Great Library Transtopia, Trans Character, Trans Thomas Schreiber
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-02-23 13:28:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23712253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blessedharlot/pseuds/eli-wray
Summary: You may have seen this short piece over on tumblr months ago, where Thomas rather cavalierly comes out to Jess as a woman. I'm posting it here too, just polished up a bit, so that I can expand on it in a longer piece shortly.It's a part of what is becoming a #Great Library Transtopia, now including Nic, Glain and Thomas as some flavor of transgender in various stories. Check the tag for more.
Relationships: Jess Brightwell & Thomas Schreiber
Comments: 3
Kudos: 3





	You Never Asked

Jess had woken up to a request from Thomas waiting on his Codex - he wanted Jess to join him in his workshop, to assist with a project this morning. And Jess had been delighted to see it. One of the great satisfactions he found these days was the opportunity to simply walk to where Thomas was working, on the spur of the moment, and help his friend create something he wanted to create.

So here they were around a forge again, wearing comfortable, protective clothes and with an air of peace about the room. Thomas examined and prepared a mold while Jess monitored their luxurious setup for melting the metal alloy they were using.

But Thomas now frowned into the mold.

“Something wrong, Thomas?” Jess asked.

He chewed his bottom lip and stared into the distance. "I fear I've missed something my assistant said about her family," Thomas said. "I've been overly focused on my work again."

Jess nodded. There was only one topic she had spoken of in Jess’ presence. He suspected she might have lost Thomas’ attention with it. "Her son is twelve, and has a coming-of-age ritual soon. He's going to be a man, as she informed me several times on my way in."

"Hm," Thomas’ frown softened into a thoughtful expression. "A fine choice."

"What is?"

"A man."

Jess chuckled. "I don't remember imagining myself a man when I was that young,” he mused. “Before taking the Library test, before finishing school even. Of course I had no one telling me I was one, either."

Jess remembered reading a handful of ponderings about manhood and the requirements of it, but couldn't remember much about any arguments, except that they all felt a bit archaic. He idly wondered if Wolfe had any thoughts on the matter. Or Glain.

"Any opinions on what makes a man a man?" Jess asked Thomas.

"I haven't thought much about that."

"You haven't? No pondering what defines manhood and how to reach it?" One eye on the forge, Jess stepped away to arrange some nearby tools that he knew Thomas would want. "Age. Action. Ethical fiber, moral fortitude? … body hair?"

"Not really," Thomas said, collecting a second mold and checking its suitability.

"Was there a point in time,” Jess mused, “when you felt like more of a man than you did before?"

"Definitely not."

Jess was startled at Thomas' unexpectedly firm response, and raised his eyebrows in a request for further information. 

"Mostly because," Thomas said, his own brow furrowed as though the thought might just be occurring to him, "I don't think of myself as a man."

"What?" Jess said without thinking. He hadn't considered Thomas feeling any other way. "What… what do you think of yourself as?"

Thomas shrugged. "When I think of a gender? Probably woman, I suppose. I haven't spent much time on it." He laid the two molds next to each other at the forge.

Jess blinked. He was thoroughly astonished. He hadn’t known. His mind raced back over everything he knew about Thomas, and this had never come up. Jess saw no hints of it. He worried he might have done something wrong, inadvertently.

_ Don't hurt Thomas' feelings right now,  _ he thought suddenly, _ whatever you do! _

"Of course." Jess smiled quickly. "Thank you for telling me. How… how long have you known this?"

Thomas frowned thoughtfully. "Not sure."

“Should I… call you by another name?”

Thomas looked confused. “You know my name. It’s Thomas.”

Jess was at a loss. "Should I use different pronouns, then?"

"No need."

Jess furrowed in confusion. "Are you sure? Thomas?"

Thomas shrugged. "One pronoun is much like another."

Jess hadn't thought of that before. "I just want to make sure that…"

_ What? What do I want to accomplish here? What do I want to make sure Thomas has? _

_ Would someone even know this if he didn’t tell them? I didn’t. What if my gender wasn't clear to my friends? What would that even feel like? _

Thomas had walked to the other end of the workshop to gather another mold, and was returning while Jess still scrambled for words, for an understanding he couldn’t find. So he just said what he knew best. "I love you, Thomas. And I… I would never want you to think that your friends don't know you."

Thomas finally looked up from his items in his hands, and gave Jess a long gaze. Then he grinned at him. "You know me."

Thomas walked back toward the forge. Without thought Jess shifted to where he knew Thomas needed him to be. Thomas gestured as though Jess had made his point for him.

"You know how to stay out of my way while I work," he told Jess. "And where to stand to help. That's more important than gender."

Jess nodded, unsure of how else to respond… except to hold the molds firm where Thomas needed them as he poured the molten metal.

Jess thought of something else as Thomas finished his pour. 

"And," Jess said. "And... if you want to… wear other clothes…"

"Why?" Thomas asked. "Do these stink already?"

"No. I mean. Women's clothes."

Thomas looked puzzled, then amused.

"If I'm a woman, and I own these…" He gestured to what he wore. "Then these are women's clothes."

Thomas slapped him on the back hard enough to leave a red mark, and returned to his work.

Jess blinked in confusion. But Thomas looked content, and that was good enough for him. They’d figure it out together, he supposed.


End file.
